Praying...

I have been praying alot lately. I have been praying for guidence and for God to wash away all this bitterness from me. I think it is working so far. 

I have been thinking about about why i think into things too much. I just have had past experiences that have caused me to double back and look at everything again and again. I know i need to trust the ones i love more, but i just can't help but feel like i am going to get myself hurt if i open up too much. I think it is because i don't have work to cover my mind with like a safety blanket, everything is just there for me to see and look into more than i should. 
I just don't like it when people sugar coat things too much when i ask for the truth. My mother use to do that thinking that it was for the best. 

Ugh, that and I am going to work on quitting smoking come New Year's, that and hitting the gym hard, getting knee deep in school and looking hardcore for work. I have a Palm now and i am trying to stay on top of it to help me reach my goals. Also, i will be getting a unlimited month bus pass, so watch out RTA, here I come.