Nothingness...

I don't really know what I am feeling right now. It's to mixed up to express or put into words. If I had to pick something at this moment I would say numb and empty.
I keep hating myself for feeling this way, like "Stop that Sarah, some how you have always managed." And the good old saying, "This too shall pass." But this still feels like the end for me. I keep trying to push and I get nothing back. There is no give to this feeling that I am trapped in.
I know this sounds awfully emo, but I think we all have to have our emo moments some more than others.
I just feel like I have failed my loved ones and myself. That there is nothing that I can do for them. Everything I try is fruitless. I pray for this feeling to stop but then I just feel even worse.
I know I need to snap myself out of it but it is like I am stuck on repeat. I think I have to close myself off from the world for a bit, but even that is impossible right now.
I just want to sit in the back seat of my mind and just watch my life through my eyes like a bad movie.

This is starting to sound like a sappy emo story.
I'll type more later...